Hey, kids! What day is it?

Prince Spaghetti Day?

No.

Rex Manning Day?

Also no.

Feast of the Fools?

Wha?

Buffet of the Buffoons?

That’s a fun and evocative phrase, but it’s not a thing. It’s Veneta Day!

Velveeta Day!?

Stop it.

Vagina Day!

No!

Valentine Dimsdale!

That’s not a thing, either.

Reverend Dimsdale from Scarlet Letter‘s fancy, well-dressed brother.

…

You’re ruining Veneta Day.

Ken Babbs did that years ago.

I’ve been listening to 8/27/72 for God knows how many years, and I keep thinking I’m going to stop hating the sound of his voice and the content of his announcements.

Nope.

Fucker liked that microphone.

Someone had to be in charge.

Isn’t it weird how people who think that someone needs to be in charge always think that the person in charge should be them?

Downright peculiar.

Let’s stop screwing around and let the nice people listen to the Veneta show.

Sure. What if they want to look at a fat guy with his ding-dong hanging out of his jeans?

16:50.

…

Yup. Ding-dong.

You think it’s for Harambe?

Yes. Yes, I do.