GOTHAM CITY – NIGHT – EXT.

The BATSIGNAL is shining against the clouds.

COMMISSIONER GORDON and a UNIFORMED COP are standing besides the spotlight.

COP
So, uh, where is he, Commissioner?

COMMISSIONER GORDON
It takes him a while to get moving.

STATELY WAYNE MANOR – BEDROOM

ALFRED flings the curtains back.

ALFRED
You truly must get up now, Master Bruce.

SLEEPY BATMAN
Five minutes, Alfred.

ALFRED
The Joker’s killed a dozen people already.

SLEEPY BATMAN
But I’m so sleepy.

Excuse me. Stop this. Stop this right now.

Dude, you can’t interrupt a script. I’m a professional screenwriter now.

You’re not, and this is terrible.

Sleepy Batman is a solid premise.

It’s not. You thought up the name “Sleepy Batman” and you started giggling like a nonce and then you started typing brainlessly.

Nooooo.

Really? Okay, fine. Explain to me the joke.

He’s so fucking sleepy!

This post is over.

Did it ever start at all?