I had to watch this and piss myself, and now so do you. There aren’t enough Fuck thats in all of creation for this bullshit.

ALSO: Whoever named Mont Blanc literally could not have put in less effort. Maybe if he called it Mont Grand, but that’s it. (I am assuming the namer of Mont Blanc was a man because we both know women weren’t allowed to do shit like that back then. Hell, the people who actually lived on and around the mountain weren’t even allowed to name the suckers.)

ALSO ALSO: I think you could ski down the right slope. You would have to be a good skier, though. If you’re still making pizza slices with your skis, then you might not make it in one piece. Worrying, too, is the fact that the snow only goes a couple thousand feet and then instantly becomes a semi-vertical field of granite. Maybe you could do some sort of rocket-assisted LEAP away from the cliff and WUH-PAMP reveal your wingsuit, and glide lithely to the nearest chic bistro for some vin du table and casual sex.

ALSO ALSO ALSO: If I were God, I’d flick these fuckers off that ridge with My mighty finger, just for making Me nervous.