- How to solve the Israel/Palestine thing.
- Rumors about how large Huey Lewis’ dong is.
- Trepanation.
- Jade Helm.
- Weaponized stampedes.
- Intra-band politics.
- Inter-band politics. (I will refrain from talking about the trade deal the Dead just signed with the Foo Fighters.)
- I will not do my Bill Walton impression and tell made-up stories about Coach Wooden.
- Big-Dicked Sheila. (Sorry, gorgeous. You know I love you, but they just wouldn’t understand.)
- Precarious Lee.
- Also: T-shirt Tuesday, the Briefcase of Infinite Felonies, Little Aleppo, the Dead’s involvement in the white slave trade, the Wall of Sound becoming sentient, Brent’s numerous sexual perversions.
- I have 45 minutes to think of a better compliment for a musician than “motherfucker.”
- And, yeah: it’s satellite and you can say it, I suppose, but: no. TotD is for the children.
- State’s rights.
- “Innocently” wonder how Mrs. Donna Jean is.
- Tell you what I will do, though: remember how Carol Burnett used to do the earlobe thing at the end of her monologue to let her husband or children know she was thinking about them?
- Potato salad might be mentioned, and when it is: that’s for you, Enthusiasts.
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