Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To
“Whatever happens, Mickey, don’t let Ashton Kutcher play me in a movie.”
“I’m not really in charge of that, St–”
“SWEAR TO ME!”
“Okay, okay.”
OR
Ear.
OR
I’m personally shocked that Steve Jobs wore a wedding ring.
OR
“Whatever happens, Mickey, don’t let them remove the headphone jack from the iPhone.
“Again, Steve: I have no sway over these types of dec–”
“SWEAR IT, JEWBOY!”
“Fine, whatever.”
“Where did that thing come from?”
“Which thing?”
“The Apple logo, Steve. The one in between us just floating there.”
“Oh, that. Isn’t it great?”
“No.”
“Hard-light hologram. This one is 14 millimeters thinner than the last one.”
“Is that better?”
“It’s thinner.”
“How’d you manage it?”
“Took out the headphone jack.”
“Oh. And it just kinda floats there?”
“It’s the ultimate Apple product: it does nothing, but everyone knows you have one.”
“Sounds good.”
“Hey, Jobs! Asshole!”
“Stop stealing my look, man!”
There was no one they could have called to set up a stream.
It’s not that I particularly wanted to listen; I would have checked it out, though. It’s just the principle of the thing.
Seriously: no one they could have called.
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