Going through the Library to reorganize the shows and had some silly ol’ thoughts about the way folks were namin’ places back then, and I sure did wanna share some of ’em with you. Maybe it’ll getcha smilin’.

Lloyd Noble, Sam Boyd, Henry J. Kaiser, Roscoe Maples…who were these mysterious and brave people cutting swatches of life out of the broadcloth of the world? We’ll never know. (Oilman, gambler, shipbuilder, lover of pavilions. What’s weird is that Sam is short for Samantha and Roscoe is a family name, so these four names actually represent two men, two women and features a full range of ethnic diversity. Kidding: they look like political cartoon Robber Barons from the 1890’s.)

Everybody’s terrifying old favorite: War Memorial Stadium.

Was Red Rocks as bad as blue balls?

Legion Stadium is clearly where the end of Days will be kicking off.

The Mosque? In Atlanta?

Pirate’s World, Catholic Youth Center, gym, assembly hall, gym, gym, gym. They played a lot of shitty barns, didn’t they?

The Jai-Alai Fronton in Miami, which is redundant, because all a fronton is for is jai-alai. It’s like a velodrome or an aquarium or Billy’s second bedroom: only one thing gets done there and you should have realized it going in. Now, you’re sticky. (Jai-Alai is a great game: wiry Cubans who just barely sized out of jockey school whipping what amounts to a cue ball against a wall at 170 mph and catching it with wicker. Plus, betting.)

The hippie names: the Family Dog, the Great Highway, the Warehouse, the Euphoria Ballroom, the University of Oregon.

The beautiful ones: the Boston Music Hall, the Academy of Music, Winterland, the Great Western Forum, the Beacon Theatre.

The strangely generic: Atlanta Municipal Auditorium, Cape Cod Coliseum, Broome County Arena. (Was there not ONE MAN of the high standards of, say, Sam Boyd in the community? HARRUMPH.)

The cheery: Merriweather Post Pavillion. (Say it out loud. Fun, right?)

The outdoorsy: Buckeye Lake, Pine Knob, Alpine Valley

The Hellenic: the Greek Theater.

The Hellenistic: St. Paul Auditorium.