Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Tag: cheap trick

Thoughts On The Residents*

Rick Nielsen Big fan.

Robin Zander Confuses them with The Replacements and throws tantrums when corrected.

Tom Petersson “Wow, what an uncool question. So uncool of you to ask me about that.**”

Bun E. Carlos “Listen, I dunno if that shit is pussy shit or fag shit, but I’d fuck up the motherfucker who put that shit on my record player. Goddamned unnatural.***”



*Guest post by Cheap Trick

**In my head, Tom Petersson is a Mean Girl.

***Bun E. Carlos is Billy, and you know that, and you’ve always known that.

The First Thing I Did When I Got To Japan…

There are generally reasons why great bands remain obscure: drugs, or monstrous behavior, or bad luck – not Cheap Trick. They had a pretty blond lead singer, and a guitar hero, and a muscle car of a rhythm section, and hit songs, and a fierce Midwestern work ethic. Their records–mostly the first three that I’ve raved about before–were huge sounding affairs without any filler, and they had cool covers with a distinctive and memorable checkerboard logo.

This is some vintage Trick from the Cap in 1980, and if you don’t have the interest or patience, go to 20:51 and watch Oh, Candy for the perfect encapsulation of what I love about this American band: force-of-nature drumming from the iconically shlubby Bun E. Carlos; Robin Zander’s full-throated and powerful pubescent howl of a surprising pretty melody; Tom Peterson’s instantly-recognizable twelve-string bass hurricane; and Rick Nielsen just generally being himself.

Watch it; don’t watch it; life goes on.

Got My Cheap Trick Records Out

Here’s some pep in your step for a grey and shitty Thursday: Heaven Tonight, Cheap Trick’s third (and best) record. Complete with lyrics so you can sing karaoke to your children and/or pets.

Also, here’s the front of the album:

cheap trick HT front
And here’s the back:

cheap trick HT back cover
First rule of show biz: put the pretty guys in the front, hide the ugly dudes in back.


You can vote for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductees here, but if you vote for anyone but The JBs or Cheap Trick, then we can’t be friends anymore.

The JBs at their peak, with some guy singing and two brothers with weird names on guitar and bass:

And here’s the pride of Rockford, IL doing the first song of their new album:


Misguided By Voices

First thing I did when I got back to the bloggings was to check on the internals, the numbers, the data dammit. Analytics, they’re called. They are called this because it is remarkably easy to become anal about them.

That is not true.

The first thing I did when I got to Tokyo was buy a Japanese guitar.

Are you kidding me?


You’re making Cheap Trick jokes now? Cheap Trick’s one of those bands you see by accident.

The second thing I did is check whether anyone had cracked the cipher I’ve hidden within the posts that, when cracked, leads to the hidden cache of cash, fine narcotics, and solid B+ whores.

There is no such cipher, nor are cash, drugs, or…wait, why are they B+ whores? Why not A+?

Because all whore grading is situational. I’m just gonna TELL the whores that they’re just B+ and that’s gonna make ’em work that much harder. It’s gonna make ’em want it. I’m gonna whitewash their fences.

Maybe coming back wasn’t–

That has a double meaning, what I just said.

–such a great…Yeah, I got it. I see what you did there, chief.

It was a Tom Sawyer reference, but I was also referring to my gift. I’m going to give the B+ whores my gift.

Are you done?


Then do you think we might–



Wow…that is the quickest we’ve needed a replacement. This one must have had a bad motivator or something. Well then, below is a small collection of the best search terms people have used to get here recently. They’ve not been altered in any way. Also, when the police ask about me shooting the other guy, let’s all say that he was coming at me with a knife and he also looked Chechan.

We’ll have some auditions real soon and, anyway, we were thinking about going in a different direction for Mark II, so–


Cut to the list! Cut to the list!

Close, but no cigar – thoughts for someone who is deceased, thoughts to be dead, thoughts for someone who is diseased.

All of it – how much did lenny hart steal?

Actually, a pretty good idea for a post – dead logical fallacies

Weir, I know you’re out there googling yourself – phil lesh yelling at bobbyhey bobby? i was hoping you’d play slide tonightbobby problem

You gotta have a gimmick – billy kreutzmann dick punch, billy kreutzmann dickpuncher, dickpunching billy

Whatever you’re on, I want two – furrybooru fireon, bagger vance i am your caddie, gamma fuck prone.

Go to a doctor right now – total nipple refraction

This one is–completely on the level–oddly affecting and beautifully melancholy – i was called a pretty panther

It means you need to sit down and drink fluids – what does it mean when they said that the telegraph plat dance better to the grateful dead?

It wasn’t good in the first place – is 2 year old coors light still good?

Oddly specific – two dogs in communion #3

I don’t like your tone, pal – garry w. tallent jew