Tag: jim steinman

I don’t get folks who don’t love Jim Steinman; subtlety is overrated.

[embedyt] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jm4CgwRxw3Y[/embedyt]

Well, obviously if there’s a song called Faster Then The Speed Of Night that I haven’t heard, I’m going to check it out. Having done so, I must recommend spending the next three minutes and forty-five seconds gazing in wild wonder at what the 80’s hath wrought: under-the-radar homoeroticism, video arcades, billowy tunics, armored knights jousting on dirt bikes, and effects brought to you from the good folks at Video Toaster.

There is also a beefcake-type fellow in a Speedo fighting off ninjas; the beefcake’s weapon of choice is a piece of wood shaped like a Gibson Explorer and painted like Eddie Van Halen’s guitar.

You should watch it.

WARNING: The song is not good. I need to state this as plainly as possible. Nothing about it works: it’s got all the Jim Steinman ingredients–dramatic shifts in dynamics, soaring choruses, semi-clever wordplay–but whereas on Total Eclipse or Bat Out of Hell* they gel into gleefully overwrought camp, this is a mess.

Still, though: watch it.

Here’s a much better Bonnie than Prince Bonny Buddy or whatever the fuck his name was: Bonnie Tyler, who had a bunch of hits in the early 80’s and then faded from view in America, but still hit the charts in Europe thereafter.

Total Eclipse of the Heart is not some forgotten gem; it’s got 145 million views on YouTube, and is so familiar that it’s used as a jokey musical cue. But it’s a great and grandly silly song, written by the champion of the grandly silly song, Jim Steinman (the guy behind Bat Out Of Hell).

Most people point out the line about living in a powder keg and giving off sparks as the most brilliant, but I nominate “love is like a shadow on me all of the time.”If I met someone and asked them how they were doing, and they said, “Honestly? Love is like a shadow on me all of the time,” then I would marry that person.

It should also be noted that the record this song appeared on was called Faster than the Speed of Night. Swear to God.