trey kid rock

“Hey, TotD!”

Umm…hey, Trey.

“Look who I asked to join the Dead!”

You did what now?

“I asked Kid Rock to join the Dead. Everybody’s in the Dead, yay!”

Can I talk to you alone for a minute, please?

“Well, I’m talking to my new band member, Kid, here.”

Come talk to me or I’ll strike you.

“Okay.”

This stops here.

“What?”

First of all, it’s bad enough those idiots are self-aware and I have to talk to them; I’m not talking to the Phishes, too.

“Y’know, your tone is getting on my nerves a little.”

It is? Would you rather talk to, like, every other person on the internet about this? Trust me: I’m the closest thing to a friend you got from now til July 6th.

“You might have a point.”

No inviting people to join the Dead.

“Bobby is!”

He’s not allowed to! Bobby’s been calling audibles for fifty years now, and it’s getting worse lately: he tried to fill a Vicodin scrip at Starbucks last week.

“I’ve done that.”

Yeah. So: no more invites. Also…Kid Rock? Jesus, man.

“He’s my friend.’

Don’t make your problems everyone else’s.