The Instagram Hotties are
Restless, and they need somewhere to go.
Tulum calls.
Bali.
Benedict Canyon.
The Maldives.
The fucking Maldives.
“Remembering last year! Back soon!”
They miss their hair team, too.
The Instagram Hotties have withdrawn
From us
To their parents’ ranch,
Or their suspiciously-large apartments.
All their homes are hike-adjacent.
Yoga on the living room floor;
Cardio on the patio;
Cook-a-longs in the kitchen;
Mascara tutorials in the bathroom;
Instagram Hotties use every part of the buffalo.
Fuck it, I’m going out on the balcony in my underwear.
The Instagram Hotties are
Restless, and they need somewhere to go.
Alas their lives are incomplete.
Thanks to the opening lines, I tried to read the entire post to the tune of Desolation Row.