Hey, Bobby. Whatcha doing?

“I’ve signed to do a sitcom.”

No, you haven’t.

“Yuh-huh. The, uh, fellows from Long Strange Trip brought me the project. I play the road manager of a fresh-faced young jam band, Mister Blister and the Sister Kissers.”

That’s a terrible name.

“That’s just for the pilot. They change their name each episode. It’s what we call a ‘running gag’ in the comedy business.”

You are not in the comedy business.

“I’m always telling ’em stories about the old days. See, my character used to road manage Molly Hatchett, and folks would always ask, ‘Where’s Molly?’ I got some great lines like that.”

This show is a figment of your white-wine-and-valium-addled mind.

“And there’s a green spaceman. Tiny little guy. He, uh, grants wishes like a genie.”

That’s the Great Gazoo, Bobby. You’re talking about The Flintstones.

“We already shot the Bottle Episode. The, uh, youngsters get stuck in a jam for a half-hour.

Nope.

“Originally, my character’s name was gonna be Topeka Tony, but they changed it to ‘Bobby’ because I wouldn’t respond otherwise.”

Okay, that sounds right, but the rest of it is made up.