Hey, Josh. Look at you and your buddy, the Andyman.
“I can hear you.”
Quiet, Andy. Josh–
“Why does he call you Josh?”
–you can’t take Melania on tour with you. It’ll get out of hand immediately.
“Melania Trump? John, why is the booming voice that originates from outside reality talking about Melania Trump being on tour? Dead & Company tour?”
She stowed away in a road case, Andy Cohen.
“Is this true, John?’
It is, Andy. Very observant of you.
“I’m not gonna hire you or anything.”
SHWZZOP!
“Did you just send Andy Cohen to the Castle of All Tears?”
Yes.
“Dude, stop being a dick to my friends.”
I’ll bring him back if you get rid of Melania. She absolutely cannot be hanging around Dead & Company Summer Tour 2018. I don’t want you guys to be in play. Like, in a media sense. The less people examine Billy’s background, the better it is for the Dead’s legacy.
“I’m handling it.”
If the Dead wind up in the Problem Attic because of you, so help me God I’ll strangle you with your own enormously-crotched pants.
“I’m handling it!”
DING
“Ah, shit. How did you get into my hotel room?”
“Vith my charm, Lover Man.”
“And you redecorated.”
“Melania makes vherever she is home.”
“It looks like Staten Island threw up.”
“I do not know vhat is this Staten Island. Now come to Melania. Let me lay under you vhile you thrust.”
“You are the single least sexy human on the planet.”
“Sveat on me, Lover Man.”
Dude, this is not handling it.
“I’m handling it!”
Melanie. good to see you. a welcome development.