Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Play It Loud, And Four Or Five Times In A Row

I’m just trawling the Comment Section for content at this point; Valued Commentator JES reminds us of the greatest Stones song that none of the Stones played on.

(But HOLY SHIT what a band! Ry Cooder on slide–you knew that–but did you know about Randy Newman on piano? That one! With the curly hair and the Oscars! Plus, Jerry Scheff from Elvis’ Vegas band on bass!)

OR

This is the most evil lyric ever written. All that semi-satanic bullshit Slayer and those other heavy mental bands growled pales in comparison, espcially to the opening verse.

Didn’t I see you down in San Antone on a hot and dusty night?
We were eating eggs in Sammy’s when the black man there drew his knife
Aw, you drowned that Jew in Rampton as he washed his sleeveless shirt
You know, that Spanish-speaking gentlemen the one we all called Kurt
Come now, gentleman, I know there’s some mistake
How forgetful I’m becoming now you fixed your business straight
I remember you in Hemlock Road in nineteen fifty-six
You’re a faggy little leather boy with a smaller piece of stick
You’re a lashing, smashing hunk of man your sweat shines sweet and strong
Your organs working perfectly but there’s a part that’s not screwed on
Weren’t you at the Coke convention back on nineteen sixty-five?
You’re the misbred, gray executive I’ve seen heavily advertised
You’re the great, gray man whose daughter licks policemen’s buttons clean
You’re the man who squats behind the man who works the soft machine
Come now, gentleman your love is all I crave
You’ll still be in the circus when I’m laughing, laughing in my grave
When the old men do the fighting and the young men all look on
And the young girls eat their mothers meat from tubes of plasticon
Be wary of these my gentle friends of all the skins you breed
They have a tasty habit they eat the hands that bleed
So remember who you say you are and keep your noses clean
Boys will be boys and play with toys so be strong with your beast
Oh Rosie dear, don’tcha think it’s queer so stop me if you please
The baby is dead, my lady said, “You gentlemen, why, you all work for me”
If they had played this at Altamont, way more kids would have died.

8 Comments

  1. mikemj

    This sounds better than the version on Metamorphosis.

  2. Tim

    Is this the same soft machine from Truckin’?

    • Is It About My Cube

      “You’re the man who squats behind the man who works the soft machine”

      He’s Robert Wyatt’s drum tech.

  3. wrayven

    The movie version of Memo From Turner with Jack Nitszche producing is probably the best performed of the 3 versions. These are all LA players who probably nailed it in 2-3 takes(just checked notes and the track features Jerry Scheff on bass(studio legend who played with The Doors & Elvis) & Randy Newman on piano. Byrds drummer Gene Parsons on the skins). It’s too polished for my taste, so we have 2 other versions to choose from. The Al Kooper version is the weakest take, but it’s still pretty good(audio sucks).

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=32KvybJeTrE

    My favorite version of Memo From Turner is the first one that Mick supposedly did at Traffic’s practice space where they had a 4 track(I have seen listed as part of Beggars Banquet outtakes. It allegedly features Stevie Winwood playing about everything except the drums.The take certainly sounds like Mr Fantasy era Traffic with Mick singing. The anecdote is Mick was trying out Jimmy Miller who engineered the demo

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tzRIKEGcVlI

    The best part of Memo From Turner is Keith Richards has a writing credit yet performs on none of the known versions He must have hated those lyrics. Who knew that Jagger was pointing to gender fluidity.

  4. Cube

    Who’s on drums? Sounds charlie-esque

    • JES

      Per wiki . . .

      The third version of the song, typified by its slide guitar, was the one recorded for the soundtrack to the movie Performance, starring Mick Jagger as the song title’s “Turner”. It is featured prominently in the movie, with Mick Jagger, as Turner, lip-synching it. This is the more well-known version of the song, as it was released as a solo single by Jagger in England in 1970 and is featured on the later Singles Collection: The London Years. This track was recorded in Los Angeles in early 1970, and uses the vocal track of the first, slow version. The tape of Jagger’s vocals was sent to Jack Nitzsche, where all music parts were recorded by Ry Cooder on slide guitar, Russ Titelman (guitar), Randy Newman (piano), Jerry Scheff (bass) and Gene Parsons (drums).

  5. Clucker

    The lyrics and delivery are like a Stones’ take on Dylan’s style.

    • Weishopped

      Pretty much “The Ballad of Frankie Lee and Judas Priest” crossed with “I Dreamed I saw St Augustine” (assuming those are mashed out of something else).
      It’s fine nonetheless!

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