- Someone remind Billy that precisely none of the Four Questions is “Mind if I stick it in ya for a while?”
- Who ordered the bacon-and-shrimp pizza with extra cheese? Do you realize how wrong you got that?
- It’s not the gift holiday, Bobby.
- Please stop using matzoh as ninja stars.
- Speaking of matzoh: don’t eat any, Garcia. Between that and the Persian, you’ll never make another doodie.
- Well, the Maneschevitz is kind of red whiskey, if you think about it aaaaand Phil drank all the Maneschevitz. Please don’t let him vomit in here: Maneschivitz vomit stains down to the Earth’s mantle.
- No, Phil, “chopped liver” isn’t a euphemism, it’s actually made of aaaaaand Phil ate all the chopped liver.
- It’s not the fasting holiday, Bobby. We’re seated at a dinner table with freshly-prepared food in front of us.
- Brent, go back to the kid’s table.
- These bitter herbs are dank as fuck, yo.
- We should get some bitter coke, too. Call your guy.
- It is also not the candle holiday, Bobby. Partially because the candle holiday is the same as the gift holiday. Which it remains not.
- Nor is it Mickey’s birthday, Bobby. Mickey’s birthday is not a Jewish holiday. Stop asking me silly questions.
- Stop crying, Bobby.
- Bobby: stop crying.
- …
- Go to the children’s table, Bobby.
Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To
Tag: phil lesh (Page 74 of 105)
A rare action photo, we see here that Phil has been frightened and has begun to withdraw his head into his carapace for protection. Sadly, we are missing the next pictures in the series which show the next steps in Phil’s defense mechanisms, in which he curls into a balls and sprays the room with highly-poisonous mist from specially-evolved anal sacs.
Phil could also–using an also-specially-evolved sphinctor on the specially-evolved anal sacs–concentrate the noxious juices into a tobacco juice ptooey of a death shot, and he was accurate, too. Phil once bullseyed a roadie who wasn’t paying attention at a range of, say, 15 meters.
You going somewhere with this?
I have quite literally no idea what any of this is about.
Good that you shared it, then.
Phil has banned Donald Sterling from Terrapin Crossroads for life.
He’s on his second liver and set of choppers, his twentieth bass, his thirtieth keyboardist, and seventy-fourth year.
But he’s still got every hair God put on his head.
Fat, drunk, and surly is no way to go through life, Phil.
On the subject of boners, Phil once remarked that his penis was average-sized, but his mind was hung like an abnormally smart horse. No one had the first idea what the fuck he was talking about.
All that’s going on in this shot is teeth and cock.
- The bait popcorn has failed. I repeat, the bait popcorn has failed. Billy has now laid his dick in a paying customer’s popcorn.
- No, Bobby: we can’t show Star Wars. I can’t even begin to go into the reasons why not.
- Hey, it’s TC! Hi, TC: I’ll have a large soda and a nachos, please.
- I understand that Brent wants to see the movie, but Time Sheath technology is supposed to be a fucking secret and it’s hard to keep things under wraps when a guy who died 25 years ago is wandering around.
- Why did Mickey bring a duffel bag full of raccoons?
- What do you mean you;ve lost Billy? I need a 20 on Billy STAT, people.
- Somebody is smoking clove cigarettes up in here.
- I don’t know, my boss had the tickets. It’s about Bobby Garcia from the Rolling Stones.
- Seriously: someone tell Brent to knock it off: he’s wandering around making ghost noises and people are beginning to ask questions.
- No, Phil: Adrienne Barbeau is not in the movie. No, not even a cameo.
- No, Mickey: it’s not a sequel to Cannonball Run. I can’t even imagine where you came up with that. Also, I need you to show me the bag with the raccoons still in it; your assurances are not good enough.
- I’ve got a protectionist’s dick confirmed punched: Billy is in the area. Go to infrared.
- Well, it’s a documentary about a 70-year-old guitarist, so there probably won’t be any cartoons before the feature, but you never know.
- You dosed the ushers? I dosed the ushers! Jesus, how many people dosed the ushers? We should check on them.
- All attempts to put Billy down have failed. Make ready Gipsy Danger.
Listen up, sinners, spinners, and bread-winners because Thoughts on the Dead provides you with the nummies, the yummies, and the head-wind in your tummies with this fresh-as-flesh selection: 10/24/72 in the Milwaukee Performing Arts Center.
Just the second set for this one, and there’s a sound drop-off before Casey Jones, but it doesn’t matter: this one’s about the Stomp. the Philo Stomp, in all its “screwing around with the Quad sound” beauty and drive. This one, though, is not just HoF: it verges–and you might want to sit down or adopt a rescue dog for this revelation–on BEST EVAR.
I said it. EVAR. (Honestly, though: adopt a rescue dog. A lot of people find they don’t know who rescued whom!)
Nine minutes into TOO, Phil starts to stomping, but Billy won’t let Phil Stomp all by himself.
“I wanna stomp with you, Philo!” Billy cried happily.
“Join me, Bill…I mean: Bill-O!”
And they laughed and laughed and then remembered they were professional musicians and shifted gears to what makes this one: Billy lays down a rock solid four-on-the-floor that anyone could follow, and no one else can resist, not Garcia or Keith and then Bobby starts playing one of those giant step chords of his and then Garcia and Bobby lay out for minutes at a time and Phil battles with Keith in the Stompatorium.
WHO WILL SURVIVE THE STOMPINATIONS?
C’mon, man. Just tell people about the show. Stop making up words.
Oh, I should just talk straight about the…ahem…”Philo Stomp?”
…
Point taken.
Then there’s the descent in the Tiger jam and back up into a He’s Gone that will touch your butthole the way you want your butthole to be touched, including “do not, under any circumstances, touch my butthole.” It will teach you the ways of love. And of joy.
…
Oh, just get it over with.
MT. PHILSUVIUS UNLEASHES DESTRUCTION ON STOMPEII!
Good job, sport.
This picture couldn’t be more ’72 if it were of Nixon dunking McGovern’s head in the toilet and blaming it on outside agitators and the Jews.
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