Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Tag: red rocks (Page 3 of 3)

Lemieux, Brute?

BIG NEWS! David Lemiuexsicaltheatre has gotten a haircut!

That’s not the big news.

Yeah? Tell that to Big-Dicked Sheila.

Please keep the actual world and your silly skitches separate.

No.

Fine. Then at least tell the nice people the actual news.

July ’78 Box Set. Three uncirculated shows from Kansas City, St. Paul, and Omaha; plus the two Red Rock shows.

Wait. Those are the part of the long-lost Betty Board cache.

Yup. Spider-Man’s back at Marvel, Bettys are back in the Vault, God’s in His Heaven, and all’s right with the world.

All?

Oh, no: not all. But those two things are cool.

Sure.

Better Dead Than Red

Red Rocks is aptly, if unimaginatively, named and the Dead loved playing there and the Deadheads loved seeing them there. Everyone else hated it: trucks couldn’t get in, so the gear had to be strapped to donkeys or convicts and walked to the stage; plus, the surrounding area is not so much bong-hits-and-skiing Colorado as it is Nazi-memorabilia-and-crank Colorado, so the fans weren’t particularly welcome. By ’87, the Dead had gotten too big for the venue and would never return. (Mickey came back alone in 1989 because he had lost his wallet and thought maybe it was there.)

But the band and the fans dug it while it lasted and here’s why:

dead red rocks
I’m sure all of you can see the appeal in an early evening spent like this:

red rocks dusk
Or a summer afternoon soaking up the sun with your friends and the Dead:

red rtocks deadThe above picture contains a rare glimpse of Precarious Lee’s greatest triumph. He had stacked things on top of other things, sure. There was duct tape by the mile, yes. But he had never before leaned a speaker bank against some rickety scaffolding. They told Precarious it couldn’t be done, and then they showed Precarious the math that proved it couldn’t be done, and while they were fucking around with their books and pencils, Precarious had screwed the stub of a Marlboro into the corner of his mouth and gotten shit done.

The TotD recommendation of the day is 8/31/78 from Red Rocks. Spencer was looking for a good Red Rocks show, and I answered him with authority.

Authority. Not, you might notice, accuracy. I was thinking of 8/30, with its first-ever Ollin Arageed (that they do not how to play) and one of only three (or so) If I Had the Worlds.

My allergy to research has seemingly screwed us, but not for a loophole: all the shows from ’78 (in America) were pretty damn good and the 8/31 is no exception. Big ol’ Terrapin. Scrumptious* Black Peter. Plus, first-ever Shakedown that only lasts six minutes, which I felt was rude of them.

So: yes, 7/7 and 8 are probably “better” and “more enjoyable” and “less not as good” but have a little love for an underappreciated show and give it a spin.

*Using scrumptious to describe anything other than certain foods deeply disturbs people.

“You see the game?”

“Fuckin-a, I saw the game. Guerrero’s curveball is scrumptious.”

“I’m gonna go drink my beer over there. Don”t follow me.

Good Day At Red Rocks

Step right up, cats and kittens. Sup upon the milk of human kindness that TotD lavishes upon you. DRINK FROM THE NIPPLES OF HOPE, CHILDREN.

Ew. And I’m still keeping an eye on you after that MLK bullshit.

Fine: 8/31/78 from Red Rocks.

It only has the first ever Shakedown AND an Ollin Arageed Jam so brand-new and piping-hot that even the band didn’t know how it went AND the only Nobody’s Fault Jam from all of 1978 AND a steel drum-infused Jerry Drums AND the only recorded instance (that I can think of with no research, as usual) of Bobby fucking up the words to Playing in the Band AND a HoF Ship of Fools.

That’s all that this show has.

I wasn’t going to bring this up, but–using Time Sheath technology, Dr. King actually attended this show.

What did I JUST say. you loathsome titfucker?

Been All Around This World

Going through the Library to reorganize the shows and had some silly ol’ thoughts about the way folks were namin’ places back then, and I sure did wanna share some of ’em with you. Maybe it’ll getcha smilin’.

Lloyd Noble, Sam Boyd, Henry J. Kaiser, Roscoe Maples…who were these mysterious and brave people cutting swatches of life out of the broadcloth of the world? We’ll never know. (Oilman, gambler, shipbuilder, lover of pavilions. What’s weird is that Sam is short for Samantha and Roscoe is a family name, so these four names actually represent two men, two women and features a full range of ethnic diversity. Kidding: they look like political cartoon Robber Barons from the 1890’s.)

Everybody’s terrifying old favorite: War Memorial Stadium.

Was Red Rocks as bad as blue balls?

Legion Stadium is clearly where the end of Days will be kicking off.

The Mosque? In Atlanta?

Pirate’s World, Catholic Youth Center, gym, assembly hall, gym, gym, gym. They played a lot of shitty barns, didn’t they?

The Jai-Alai Fronton in Miami, which is redundant, because all a fronton is for is jai-alai. It’s like a velodrome or an aquarium or Billy’s second bedroom: only one thing gets done there and you should have realized it going in. Now, you’re sticky. (Jai-Alai is a great game: wiry Cubans who just barely sized out of jockey school whipping what amounts to a cue ball against a wall at 170 mph and catching it with wicker. Plus, betting.)

The hippie names: the Family Dog, the Great Highway, the Warehouse, the Euphoria Ballroom, the University of Oregon.

The beautiful ones: the Boston Music Hall, the Academy of Music, Winterland, the Great Western Forum, the Beacon Theatre.

The strangely generic: Atlanta Municipal Auditorium, Cape Cod Coliseum, Broome County Arena. (Was there not ONE MAN of the high standards of, say, Sam Boyd in the community? HARRUMPH.)

The cheery: Merriweather Post Pavillion. (Say it out loud. Fun, right?)

The outdoorsy: Buckeye Lake, Pine Knob, Alpine Valley

The Hellenic: the Greek Theater.

The Hellenistic: St. Paul Auditorium.

Perhaps They’re Better Left Unsung

It wasn’t like roulette, you see. The casinos have made fortunes since they installed those immaculately legible tote boards listing the numbers that have landed previously in red with big ol’ tempting empty spaces in between and they’ve been raking cash in because your dumb ass has evolved to think 15 is gonna hit because it’s due. It makes sense to believe that present events are based upon past observation: that’s why people instinctively shielded their crotches whenever Billy came around, for al the good it would do them. Billy was like Gretzky: he could always find your five-hole.

But just as it is a logical fallacy to think that the rules of real life apply in the casino, it is also a mistake to think that Hoyle has any say over the world. (It’s called the Ludic fallacy, which I know because it is one of those facts that gets lodged in my brain instead of, say, how to find love.)  So, why do we forget that about the Dead? Why do we lionize certain shows only to ignore the rest of the week? These men were, appearances to the contrary, human. They had good runs. But the forest is invisible but for the trees, especially when some trees are, y’know, Barton Hall or Red Rocks. They suck up all the light.

Talking about the Dead is to talk about overshadowing. Garcia overshadowed the rest of the band, Mickey’s overkill overshadowed Billy’s light touch, ’77 and ’73 overshadowed all the other years, and Vince’s playing overshadowed the charitable work he did as a participant in the saddest Make-A-Wish event ever. Even Vince knew enough to be embarrassed.

We let ourselves think the greatness appeared as weird happening, crepuscular beams from a murky sea. Not so. 5/19/74 is rightfully well-regarded, especially the raging Truckin’>Mind Left Body jam. but listen to the very next show, 5/21/74 at UCLA the University of Washington* where they proceed to pull out a GODDAM 45 MINUTE PLAYIN’. Give the kids some Robotussin, shoot the dog and LISTEN to this thing, to the peaks and valleys that spring like Zeus out of inchoate spaciness one after another. (And, since it’s a GREAT matrix mix, listen to the appreciative audience cheer every twist and turn. Listen to ’em ROAR for Donna in Playin’. hell, listen to Donna!

Yeah, 2/14/70 is historic, but 2/11 is better. Yes, 1977 was THE year, but y’know: ’78 kicks more ass than an avowed lover of kicking ass who had spent his last dime to enter an ass-kicking contest in an attempt to win enough money to open his own business, a high-end Ass-Kickery.

 

*Thanks to a comment by an Esteemed Enthusiast, the location of the 5/21 show has been amended to note the actual location. For his Sherlockian abilities, he will receive a lifetime supply of Bobby Weir’s Shorts Shorteners. Shorts too long? Shorten ’em with Shorts Shortener!

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