Unacceptable Arguments In Favor Of The Confederate Flag

June 22, 2015 / Thoughts On The Dead / 0 Comments

State’s rights.
Heritage.
Because, like my daddy before me, I took a rebel stand.
It really goes with the drapes.
Someone done greased the pole, and I had sent my Cousin Bucky down to Mapleville with the digger: got a three-ton chifferobe what needs bustin’ up, so I will get them Stars and Bars down, Mr. Mayor, but it ain’t gon’ be today. How’s yo mama and them?
Benghazi.
First Amendment.
How else can we so effectively reassure white people about, and remind black people of, their respective places?
It’s actually not the Confederate flag: it’s the Battle Flag of the Confed–
SHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUP.
I hate that fucking guy with everything in my withered husk of a heart.
What will white trash hotties wear on their bikinis?
What if we only let stone-cold teen foxes wear the flag in the form of hot pants or that thing where they tie the t-shirt up right below their boobies, would that be okay?
Southern girls, they got nothing to lose.
The archery team has run out of bullseyes, and need something to aim for.
What about people from nowhere near the south who want to let everyone know that they’re terrible?
What about the foreign racists?
Won’t someone think of the foreign racists?
Everyone is really used to giving directions referencing it.
The Civil War wasn’t entirely about slavery.
Just almost entirely; there was also some bullshit about tariffs.
How come we can’t fly the flag of a traitorous rebellion above a government building, when the homosexuals can hang their rainbow flags in the windows of their privately-owned bars and artisanal charcuteries?
Can’t afford to repaint the General Lee.

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Confederate flag

20 Comments

maggiemay
June 22, 2015 at 11:28 pm

http://gizmodo.com/5973555/dumb-teen-buys-confederate-iphone-case-instead-of-uk-flag

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- maggiemay
  June 22, 2015 at 11:29 pm
  
  Ahhh, America.
  
  Reply
  - thoughtsonthedead (Post author)
    June 22, 2015 at 11:40 pm
    
    It’s like Jesus said, “Blessed are the dumb, just keep them over there and don’t let them burn the place down.”
    
    Reply
  - maggiemay
    June 22, 2015 at 11:48 pm
    
    Beautiful.
    
    Reply
- August West
  June 23, 2015 at 8:11 am
  
  Lynyrd Skynyrd c’aint be wrong.
  Guitarist Gary Rossington (2012): “We know what the Dixie flag represents and its heritage; the Civil War was fought over States rights.”
  See, keepin’ slaves is yer ‘right’. Deep South thinkers to the end. hahaha.
  
  http://wac.450f.edgecastcdn.net/80450F/catcountry1073.com/files/2012/09/4411773595_45eafacdb7_z-630×406.jpg
  
  Reply
kate
June 22, 2015 at 11:40 pm

Always found it a tad strange that “night they drove old Dixie down” was written by a Canadian of mixed native(Mohawk six nations), and Jewish heritage.

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FreedomHaul
June 23, 2015 at 7:55 am

re the last bullet point: I’m currently living in northern Maine. Like, the frontier, the absolute top, I-can-peer-into-New-Brunswick-as-I-write-this northern Maine. It’s about as geographically far removed from the South as one can be and still be in this nation is your take-away.

Anywho, the tiny township I reside in has a total population of maybe 372 living people, and I’ll be damned if within a quarter-mile from my home there are not one but *two separate motor vehicles painted like the General Lee*.

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- August West
  June 23, 2015 at 8:31 am
  
  I think I saw them jacking moose on North Woods Law. There was a guy with a bunch of missing front teeth with the nickname Broken Bottles. hahaha.
  https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/71/8b/7f/718b7f08759b03f4f15507c315df2d37.jpg
  
  Reply
- generalstaggerlee
  June 23, 2015 at 8:38 am
  
  http://www.quickmeme.com/img/52/529c4893538d7a1fde6a0dba892051ae8fbfbdd50c6c8ba5576cc8111c4471a2.jpg
  
  Reply
- August West
  June 23, 2015 at 9:19 am
  
  I’m goin’ cow tippin’ ta’nite. Y’all up fer it?
  https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/ab/00/23/ab00239c9fa20abd9299bbe00b1500d4.jpg
  
  Reply
  - spencer
    June 23, 2015 at 9:55 am
    
    http://www.theweeklings.com/wp-content/uploads/hippie.jpg
    
    Reply
  - spencer
    June 23, 2015 at 9:56 am
    
    My bad, i mistook a phish wookie for a redneck
    
    Reply
  - August West
    June 23, 2015 at 10:13 am
    
    Phish Food will do that to you.
    
    Reply
  - August West
    June 23, 2015 at 10:14 am
    
    Q What is wrong with this pic?
    A Yes, the shiner from Billy Bob is correct. But Bambi is not pregnunt.
    https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/3a/b8/1f/3ab81f32cfd4b47aa594189f18b85a8d.jpg
    
    Reply
generalstaggerlee
June 23, 2015 at 8:43 am

http://imgfave-herokuapp-com.global.ssl.fastly.net/image_cache/1382865305586163.png

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- FreedomHaul
  June 23, 2015 at 7:03 pm
  
  *Audible laughing*
  
  Reply
Bob H
June 23, 2015 at 12:27 pm

Don’t blame it on your father,he worked the land. It was your brother who took a rebel stand.

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cgrand
June 23, 2015 at 2:32 pm

what do YOU know about chiffarobe-bustin’…boy?

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- thoughtsonthedead (Post author)
  June 23, 2015 at 7:04 pm
  
  I know I charge more than a nickel.
  
  Reply
Allan Fifield
June 24, 2015 at 11:38 pm

“Virgil Cane is my name and I worked on the Danville train…”

It wasn’t true but it was a Hell of a Myth. I’m going to miss parts of it, but this time it really is “Gone with The Wind.”

Reply