CELL PHONE NOISE
CELL PHONE NOISE
“This is–”
“John, shut the fuck up, you twat-breathed cunthair, or I’ll feed that lumpy turkey gobble you call a cock to my cat. WHERE’S MY BOYFRIEND, FUCKO? I need to fucking DATE, asshole-eyes! I fucking SING and I fucking WEAR CLOTHES and I fucking HAVE FRIENDS and I MOTHERFUCKING DATE. My BRAND is NOT BEING SERVICED, you pile of CORN-FILLED SHIT.”
…
“Hey, Taylor. How’re things?”
“Tense.”
“I hear that.”
“I’ll kill you, John.”
“Please don’t say that.”
“With my hands, John. I’ll kill you with my hands.”
“Why is this my responsibility, anyway? I’m very busy singing and wearing clothes and having friends on my own.”
“But you’re not dating. DATE ME, CUM-NOSE!”
“Cum-nose?”
“Nasal creampie.”
“Huh. Gotta try that.”
“I WILL MURDER YOU IF I AM NOT DATING SOMEONE BY THE END OF THIS PHONE CALL, MEYERS.”
“Don’t call me that.”
“And then I will LEAVE YOUR ROTTING CORPSE IN one of my MANY, MANY HOMES and I will DATE YOUR FUCKING CORPSE, JOHN!”
“You really love to date.”
“I do. What are you doing?”
“Groceries, wearing clothes.”
“You love wearing clothes.”
“I do.”
“Where’d you get those pants?”
“Borrowed them from Bobby. Wait: can you see me?”
“Don’t worry about it. DATE ME, MOTHERFUCKER!”
“Taylor, listen: I can’t–
CALL WAITING SOUND
CALL WAITING SOUND
“–do this right now, and…shit, hold on. I’ll be right back.
…
“It’s Mayer, player.”
“WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRR! I drop bomb on all you hot dog dicks!”
“Who is this?”
“This is Kim Jong-Un from Only Korea. Put Harry Mendoza on line.”
“Hold on.”
“COCKSUCKA!”
…
“Taylor, I should take this.”
“COCKSUCKER!”
For Tor……
Damn Spencer
Thanks for that.
that’s the best! you’re gonna wind up working for Hockey Night in China head of PR.
i see you’ve been hard at work http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/ottawa/belleville-mannequins-stolen-1.3697737
That was me, I needed some companions for my adventure on the Bay of Quinte!
Yes, take a boatload of Sexy Mannequins (Misty, Amber, Pegasus….) and party down at the Sandbanks.
Very excited about this new character development.