Ah! Bad Santa!
“I have introduced this man to you several times.”
ZZ Toppermost?
“His name is–”
Hamadryades, Protector of the Oaken Forest?
“You’re an intolerable soul.”
Uh-huh. Hey, you banging Halsey? You should get on that. She looks like a female version of Pink.
“I’m leaving that one alone.”
Nice. But, seriously: hit that shit. We’re all rooting for you.
“Stop doing that.”
Nah. Living vicariously through your peen, bro. Stick it in famous people.
“Can we just fast forward to the part where my phone rings and it’s, like, the worst person in the world on the other end?”
You’ll like this one.
“I won’t.”
Promise.
CELL PHONE NOISE
“Hate you.”
…
“You’re on with–”
“TAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE…”
DEEP BREATH
“THEEEEEEEEEMMMM…”
DEEP BREATH
“OFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF!”
“Who is this?”
“I DON’T LIKE THESE SHOOOOOOOOOOOES!”
“Okay. Hold, please.”
…
“Jackass?”
Yuh-huh?
“Is this your nephew?”
Nephew on the Dead, yes. All the Enthusiasts love him except for one, and fuck her.
“Sure. Please don’t put him on the phone with me any more.”
In his defense, he really did not enjoy the boots.
“Hate you.”
who doesn’t adore NotD? it is not possible.
Whoooooooaaaaaa . . . . . . . Is that the Playset of Infinite Felonies from Fisher Price on the table there??? You already training him to be on The Crew????
Righteous! Who needs boots when you break into anything and power an army on stolen juice?
good to see NotD is on his way to understanding the Mysteries of the Schlage. he’ll go a long way knowing how to use a tension wrench.
go with the plimsoul
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dPHAfFC9IHA
NotD is going to hate you in about 13 years. Also, that toy lock thingie is dope.