- Why do all the intern candidates have nude shots? Because there is too many 8X10 glossies of dong up in here. This plan has backfired into our faces, y’all.
- Can you make coffee?
- Got a liver?
- You’re the new road manager.
- You’ve just been fired as the road manager.
- Can you drive a stick?
- Can you drive a stick after you’ve been dosed?
- Well, we’re gonna find out, aren’t we, Slugger? Here’s the keys.
- We’ve had a lot of the scions and doyennes of San Francisco royalty apply for these jobs, but no one with your pedigree, Harvey Milk, Jr!
- How flammable are you, scale of one to ten?
- I’m gonna just be honest with you, Carrie: you’re a stone cold teen fox and that’s going to be a problem in this work environment. Mostly in that closet right there of this work environment: it’s where Billy likes to pretend he’s a trapping spider.
- Also, Carrie, since it’s the 70’s, it’s perfectly okay and legal somehow for all of this to go down. Try not to get pawed at by Billy on your way…you are getting pawed at by Billy. Good luck with that.
- Someone tell Mickey to stop playing the applicant pool. It’s just weird and seems like he’s trying too hard.
- I’m not going to tell you again, Mr. Davis: you can;t be an intern because you own the company and besides, Bobby thinks you’re gross and won’t shower in front of you for a million solo albums.
- Do you have any coke?
- Do you have any aunts and uncles?
- Do they have any coke?
- Seriously, find some coke, kid.
- COCAINECOCAINE NOMNOMNOM
- Hi, I’m gonna be doing the interview now.
- So: got any coke?
Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To
Tag: mickey hart (Page 52 of 71)
Presented without comment.
You just couldn’t think up a joke.
…
Shut up, you.
Guitar strings: 16
Guitar knobs: 2,112
Fingers: 59.5
Boobies: 2
Actual amount of boobies: 4
Phil’s BAC: 1.3
Creepy background children you didn’t notice at first: 1
How many drums did Mickey and Billy (mostly Mickey) have?
Newton and Leibniz came up with calculus pretty much simultaneously: Leibniz in Germany because when you’re named “Leibniz,” that’s where you have to be from; and Newton up in the beauty salon getting his hair did. Both men solved Zeno’s Paradox by realizing up a shit load of infinites equals a finite.
Late on, Georg Cantor formalized the math of infinity, proving that infinity was more than any countable set, while at the same time containing all infinite sets, including sets larger than itself.
Billy and Mickey got more drums than that.
Hey, Garcia. Whatcha doing?
“Sitting huddled in the darkness.”
Um. Yeah.
Ever since Billy saw the X-Men movie, he had been making everyone refer to him as Billverine and kept bothering the guys at Alembic about installing him an Adamantium boner.
Phil’s hat, Mickey’s scarf, Keith’s everything, Bobby’s belt buckle, Garcia’s hygiene, Mickey’s mamma mia, mamma mia, mamma mia figaro.
Also, even though Billy’s not there, Garcia is still protecting his dick.
EDIT: And why the fuck is Mickey wearing gardening gloves?
How many Hawaiian shirts does the man own?
Also: Garcia dug out the Summer Shorts,
PLUS Brent. Just…fucking…Brent.
Someone once told the Dead to be themselves and they ran with it.
Hey guys. Whatcha doing?
“Rocking out.”
On purpose?
…
“Yes?”
“Sure, why not?”
“PHIL IS ROCKING INTENTIONALLY.”
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