This has been floating around the internet for the past few days, and so I present it to you: Ladies and gentlemen, the least interesting Dead & Company document in existence. This is some boring-ass white person food. If this menu were a vacation, it would be a week in a Delaware laundromat.
Assorted notes:
- If Bobby sees a fish, Bobby eats the fish; that’s why he’s not allowed in aquariums.
- John Mayer’s meal is what they give you after surgery; it’s food to contemplate suicide by.
- Are abs worth that?
- I don’t know if abs are worth that.
- They probably are, though.
- The Grateful Dead hates blue fin.
- Mickey out of nowhere with the pulled pork.
- Was he thinking, ‘What’s the most pain-in-the-ass food there is?’ and came up with the bullshit you have to cook for nine hours?
- Or did Mickey think the phrase “pulled pork” was funny?
- The second thing, right?
- What if you brought Mickey unpulled pork?
- Would Mickey pull his own pork?
- Does Billy ever pull his pork, by which I mean masturbate in front of strangers?
- Um.
- Uhhhh…
- Do…
- Do Oteil and Jeff Chimenti not get fed?
- What the fuck?
- That’s not cool, Dead & Company.
- Do they have to hit the Burger King drive-through on the way in to the venue?
- What if they’re running late, and don’t have time; would Mickey share his pulled pork with them?
- This is bullshit, Dead & Company.
A second page surfaced with the same healthy, unobtrusive bullshit for Jeff and Oteil. Now days, rock stars need bag men for their sugar.
Rock and roll!
Dead & the Company of My Grandmother
“just some tepid water & toast please……..do you have Peek Freans?”
Those guys are picky eaters. 🙂 I just get the leftovers, which are A-Ok with me!
Since you are so good about being TOTD, here is the list for the other two guys: https://i.imgur.com/QQWtM1E.jpg
“the precious essence that I recognized again when, all night long following a dinner at which I had eaten, they played, in farces as crude and poetic as a fairy play by Shakespeare, at changing my chamber pot into a jar of perfume.”
Jeff/Oteil’s Way
what do you call the old dude floating in the aquarium eating fish?
otter bob.
I think you meant “The Otter One”…
naw it was a misprint shoulda been odder bob.
some Rotten Eggs maybe? sorry just found this gem from the vault.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0cGkxqjz0K4
Sushi, Sashima, wild-caught salmon, nothing fried ever …
To Waffle House..
Hah.. got to love it.
https://www.facebook.com/Oteil/posts/10156513792244057
Things like that happen on tour. You do have to eat, every once in a while, and when the opportunity is there, you take it.
https://images.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=http%3A%2F%2F4.bp.blogspot.com%2F__MBlWvx9Cy8%2FSfnhq4_NlXI%2FAAAAAAAABPA%2F7YuF-6ekA20%2Fw1200-h630-p-k-no-nu%2F1971-Jerry%2BBreakfast.jpg&f=1
IHOP. Circa 1971 or 2. I believe those are “plums” floating (not in a mans’ hat, but close enough) in that bowl.
about the Spicy Rare Salmontrout. JB is JPB right? Spicy Rare Salmontrout Consultant Extraordinaire, Esq.
“quit callin’ me about the Effen Salmontrout. I already sent all the Papa John Pepperflake packets I got”