Mickey–otherwise known as Grandpa Shitposter–threw this nonsense up on his Twitter today, and there are no words.
First off: ten. There are ten Commandments. They made a movie about them. It was called The Ten Commandments. The number of commandments is not a secret. All humans know this fact. There are three Stooges, five Golden Rings, and ten Commandments. Mickey, however, includes twelve. Perhaps this is due to inflation. Maybe the last two are bonus tracks. I don’t know, but it’s wrong.
Second: only nine of the Dead Commandments are actually commandments. IV and V are merely descriptions, while IX is a suggestion. A command can’t start with the word “if,” unless you’re programming a Commodore 64 using BASIC.
Third: these are not the Dead Commandments.
I. Thou shalt choogle.
II. Rehearsing is for heathens, miscreants, and Journey.
III. Thou must not openly speak of the fans with contempt, but you can rip into ’em once you’re amongst friends.
IV. The Hells Angels must be allowed backstage.
V. All Grateful Deads are equal in the eyes of THE LORD, but Garcia gets first crack at the catering table.
VI. All Grateful Deads are equal in the eyes of THE LORD, but Bobby gets first pick in the Hostility Suite.
VII. No one’s allowed to hire an oboe player anymore, not after what happened last time.
IX. Keep your hands off each others’ wives, you fuckwits.
X. Thou must only regularly play three Chuck Berry songs, even though Chuck Berry songs are all the same, dead-simple, and quite easy to learn.
XI. Anyone who wants to be on the payroll may be on the payroll.
XII. Nobody is allowed to call Mickey “Icky Fart” anymore; it’s starting to really upset him.
The shape it takes will be yours to choose.
Did you mean to say “Condiments”?
Hey now! I just came across this post.
First off, Mickey did not create this. He just had it on his site for a while.
You are correct that there are not 10 here. The original idea was going to be ‘The Eleven’ Dead Commandments. But we were able to get ‘13’. Although, a couple of them is not in the form of an instruction. You are correct!
Not only are the defects you point out present, II. Is not really even a lyric. The lyric is a question. ‘Are you kind?’ So, Be Kind is not a Grateful Dead lyric. I made it into one. Another defect in the design.
My take on the lyrics also fall in the form of a set list follow more of a possible life journey.
Otherwise, I am sure there is no set list / show in this order.
Scarlet—>
Uncle Johns Band —>
Foolish Heart—>
Etc…
The first place to begin is always our own perspective. So, the ‘opener’ became ‘Look at it Right’…
And, in the end of ‘it all’.. My perspective is all that we have been given. Life, nature, abundance, whatever we have done, not done, accomplished, etc. is in the end not from our own hands.
So, ‘Let It Be Known’ became the encore. Hey! That fits. They have done Ripple as an encore more than a few times. 😉
This design was not meant to imitate so much the history or movie about the Ten Commandments, really, directly. It was simply inspiration I heard in the form of a direction or instruction on suggestions on how to live. Or a good way to be. They inspired me, over years, and this came through. It’s not perfect, and is not meant to be. And, it does not inspire everyone in the same way. Which is great! I appreciate your article. It made me laugh. Thanks for sharing your perspective.
Someone else used it at the Grateful Dead POP Culture conference in a presentation which was inspiring to me.
I had so much fun creating / designing / working with an artist that helped translate my idea into art.