Hey, Brett Ratner. Whatcha doing?
“Karate, judo, some of that Jap shit. Beatin’ ass!”
Great. You do a lot of martial arts?
“Is fucking a martial art?”
Only in Brazil.
“I been training with one of those Brazilian guys! Bro, I am so into MMA.”
I had a feeling. So, you got any ideas about this webcast?
“Oh, bro, I have been so inspired. Gonna do some split-screen stuff, then I’m gonna overlay some tie-dye: real trippy bullshit.”
Of course you are.
“That says ‘hippie!’ How else will people know that hippie stuff is going on?”
Why don’t you just stay out of the way of the music and show the musicians?
“Nah. People hire Brett Ratner, they get the full Brett Ratner.”
Which is?
“Superficial competence and herpes.”
Okay.
“This webcast is gonna look just fine, as long as you don’t look hard at it. Or think about it. Also, you will immediately forget it afterwards: I will make it through the entire thing without finding one memorable angle or shot or transition. But, you know: it’ll look professional and all the famous people will come away from the experience as my friend.”
Are you even a Deadhead?
“Bro, no one is a bigger Harry Mendoza fan than me.”
Figured.
“What are the drummers’ names? Icky and Sticky?”
Close enough. You gonna film any of the rehearsals?
“Rehearsals are for fags.”
There you go.
Pretty sure everyone in this band already has the full Ratner quite exactly
I give up, why are we discussing this nonsense? Was he selected as the Hollywood B level jew of the week for Yom Kippur?
Not sure if you’re serious, but:
http://www.stereogum.com/1835367/grateful-dead-members-john-mayer-team-with-brett-ratner-for-next-amex-unstaged-with-10k-free-tickets/news/
Bobby- “People who want to hear the music get to hear it for free and we get to promote our music and share it with people.”
Umm, let me see if I have this straight. So 10,000 people will hear it for free (assuming little 14 year old Johnny from Tulsa will actually get to NYC to see this trainwreck bullshit after entering 80 times with the 80 Hotmail accounts he opened up while listening to 4/20/74)? Amex will then pay this douche of all douches likely a million dollars to “direct” this thing and stream at $17.99 a pop? How altruistic. And what is this “promote our music” thing all about? Do we have some truly choogly new shit coming out of the Mayer and Co. pipe? Sound about right?
Pretty sure the stream will be free, with constant reminders to donate to Robin Hood.
http://i45.tinypic.com/ev9837.jpg
Warm up the banninator 3000, I deserve it for posting that.
He is well known for his homophones slurs isn’t he?
Yes.
I have decided to re watch the Duke 78 show on YouTube. Watching Jerry (almost) jump during Good Lovin may be the penicillin i need to cure me of this Ratner rash.
Homophones? Auto correct is wonderful.
Spencer..
I bet Rattner Rash smells a lot like woodstock wine. Sniff that rash and save yourself 40 bucks.
Brett ratners a superbug. Antibiotic resistant
Also, do you have to have an Amex card to pay for this stream of urine?
We’re going to positive today.
Also, you were right: it was Jersey, not Connecticut, where Garcia and Hunter got busted, which pisses me off because I spent time getting the spelling of Connecticut right and fuck that word.
Amen. Garcia was also very unskilled in hiding his contraband when the cherry lights went off. “Drivers license? Yeah, it’s in my briefcase, let me grab that”. Also, yes, fuck Connecticut.