Mope Francis

Aw, no. What’s the matter, buddy?

“I’m-a no happy. Is-a bad day.”

Tell me about it.

“Cafeteria outta chili.”

That’s very brave of you to eat chili in that outfit.

“Hey: I’m-a da Pope-a.”

Sure.

“Caught-a my belt-a loop onna door handle.”

Oh, that’s the worst.

“You seen-a da price of gas?”

It’s actually low as fuck, Your Holiness.

“Hey!”

Sorry.

“I-a forgive you.”

Thanks.

“That’s-a the whole gig.”

Sure. Cheer up, Pope. Think of something you’re looking forward to.

“Dead-a and Company. Summer Tour-a, bitch.”

You’re into Dead & Company?

“I-a came around-a onna Josh Meyers.”

Sure.

…

Pope?

“Si?”

That old Pope still alive?

“I-a don’ wanna talk about that-a guy. He-a barges inna! Like-a da Signore Furley, but-a gay and-a evil.

Does it lead to humorous misunderstandings?

“Look-a atta my face-a.”

I’ll take that as a ‘no.’

“Dominus vobsicum.”

Back atcha.