Musings on the Most Ridiculous Band I Can't Stop Listening To

Early And Often

“Hey! Thoughts on my Ass! How’s your crank?”

My crank’s good. I feel like you’re trying to tell me something.

“I don’t go for that understatement bullshit. I say what’s on my mind. Sometimes, I wear what’s on my mind. Depends on what shirt’s clean, I guess.”

Well, I think your ensemble makes a good point. We all gotta vote.

“Especially this time. You been reading the paper?”

Now and then.

“I try to avoid it. Don’t even get it delivered to the house anymore. But the other day, Justy told me that the paper is on the computer now. I knew it did the emails and porn, but I had no idea the paper was in there, too.”

Never ceasing are these wonders.

“Fuckin’ A! So I gave the old Chronicle a read, and found out two very important pieces of information.

Which were?

“Herb Caen doesn’t have a column any more.”

He died 20 years ago.

“Guess I learned three pieces of information today.”

What was the second thing?

“This Trump guy’s a real asshole.”


“Does everybody know?”

Also yes, but some people aren’t upset by the fact.

“Never been so glad that I left America.”

Hawaii is a state, Billy.

“Only legally, and just temporarily. Our Queen will return to us.”

I hope so.


  1. David D.

    Herb Caen == hippies

  2. orphic

    “Vote often and early for James Michale Curley” an Irish mayor of Boston who was once elected while serving time in jail, for corruption related charges of course.

  3. Mean, Green, Devil Eating Machine

    I hope they are washing that shirt between wears! The mask – I dunno about that.

  4. Sartorial Splendor

    Is everyone in the band and family wearing this Vote uniform? Haven’t achieved that level of consistency since the Go To Heaven photo shoot…

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