“Your motion was never the same after Stottlemyre got through with you.”
“I am not Dwight Gooden, Bobby.”
“Ah. I’d like to tell you about a dream I had.”
“Last night?”
“In your green room. I floated from my body and all throughout the studios of Sirius XM. I was looking for my favorite station, which is Raw Dog Comedy.”
“I wouldn’t have guessed that.”
“Stand-up needs to be savage. I need it raw.”
“Okay.”
“But I couldn’t find it, and I wound up in Jimmy Buffett’s station. Awful friendly in there. They’re up for shots.”
“Shots and yelling and no pale, hairless shins. That’s the Buffett place.”
“And, uh, then I thought I was having a stroke, but it turned out to be Kpop.”
“Those Kpop fans are downright un-American. We got our own boy bands here.”
“We’re in danger of falling behind in the Boy Band Race.”
“There’s a Boy Band Gap, right. Bobby, the Dead played a lot of country music over the years.”
“Kinda. ‘We played a handful of country songs a lot’ would be the more accurate phrasing. We meant to learn more cowboy tunes, but one thing led to another and then Garcia died. We once got halfway through Blues Eyes Cryin’ in the Rain at rehearsal, but Billy got bored and bit Ramrod and, you know, that was that. I think we started playing cock rugby after that.”
“Cock rugby?”
“It’s basically rugby, but your cock’s more involved. Fast paced.”
“I’ll bet.”
”
You don’t know me, but you don’t like me….God I love Dwight Yoakam. A little bit of Buck Owens with his son Dwight:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mB7oUI32E1Y
God the things I’d do to hear a rehearsal tape of Blue Eyes Cryin in the Rain with something like … Phil chastising Brent at the end or something.