When students send colleges their SAT scores in coming years, the admissions office might also get another number that rates the level of adversity applicants typically face — or privilege they enjoy — based on crime and poverty data and other demographic information about neighborhoods and high schools.

The “overall disadvantage level,” known in admission circles as the “adversity score,” will be a single number from 1 to 100. With 50 set as the average, under a formula established by the College Board, higher scores will indicate higher adversity. Colleges that use it will see the number on a template called an “environmental context dashboard,” which also includes data on Advanced Placement participation and SAT scores at the applicant’s high school. – “Coming Soon, An Adversity Score” Washington Post, 5/16/19

100-91 

• Survived a school shooting.
• Parents dead. (Non-Batman.)
• Mugged on the way to test.
• Super Puerto Rican.

90-81

• Absent the day of school shooting.
• Share bedroom with more than three coyotes.
• Eyes real close together and no upper lip.
• Normal Puerto Rican.

80-71

• Taught to read wrong as a joke.
• Unfortunate birthmark.
• Those with Dourif Syndrome. (Sufferers of Dourif Syndrome remind those around them of Brad Dourif, but not in a good way.)
• Wrong kind of Asian.

70-61

• Lefties.
• If you show up for the SAT barefoot and in overalls, and then stop by the hardware store to pick up a few yards of gingham afterwards, you get 75 adversity points.
• Family members in prison.
• Good kind of Asian.

60-51

• Really rich, snotty South American kids who play polo.
• Been bitten by a dog (any size) that broke the skin.
• Family members in prison for insider trading or money laundering or that type of shit.
• Live within a mile of a check-cashing place.

50-41

• Owns used Kia, but had to pay for it themselves.
• Both parents in the house, but they may hate each other.
• Could differentiate between a jetty and a pier.
• Live within a mile of a Target.

40-31

• Parents purchased used Kia, but has to pay for insurance/gas.
• Smile that lights up the room.
• Access to a swimming pool.
• Live within a mile of other homes, exclusively.

30-21

• Parents paid for new Kia, and cover the insurance and gas.
• Been skiing.
• Wrong kind of white. (Jewish, Catholic.)
• Live within a mile of no one at all.

20-11

• Parents paid for Mercedes, etc.
• Traveled to a foreign country.
• Right kind of white. (Protestant, but not Southern Baptist.)
• Live within a mile of several different locations, depending on the season.

10-1

• Parents pay for Aviv, who is ex-Mossad, to drive you around in an Suburban.
• Traveled to a foreign country specifically for the purposes of skiing.
• Best kind of white. (Wealthy.)
• On the advice of your accountant, legally have no residence.