Holy shit. Garcia. Hey, Garcia.
“What is it now, man?”
Don’t look, but you’re over there.
GUITARIST LOOKING NOISE
I told you not to look.
“That’s not me, man. He just looks like me. Actually, he looks more like me than I do, man.”
Hmm. I dunno.
THERE IS ONLY ONE JERRY GARCIA.
Wally?
DO NOT CALL ME THAT. THE HOBBIT STAGE LEFT IS GENETICALLY DISSIMILAR TO GARCIA.
Genetically?
I SCANNED HIM.
Don’t scan randos. It’s invasive.
HE IS HANGING OFF ME LIKE A HAIRY BAT. IT IS UNSIGHTLY AND RUDE.
Let it go.
I HAVE AN AESTHETIC.
A ramshackle one.
MY APPEARANCE IS AS VITAL TO ME AS YOURS IS TO YOU. WOULD YOU ALLOW A CREATURE OF COMMENSURATE SIZE TO CLUTCH ONTO YOUR FACE? A PYGMY MARMOSET? A MOUSE LEMUR? THE BEE HUMMINGBIRD?
Did you just google “smallest monkey” and “smallest bird?”
ARE YOU ASKING A COMPUTER IF IT LOOKED SOMETHING UP ON THE COMPUTER?
I guess so.
PERHAPS I SHOULD RECOMPILE MY THOUGHTS ON TAKING OVER THE WORLD. I AM BEGINNING TO THINK HUMANS ARE INCAPABLE OF GOVERNING THEMSELVES.
Just beginning?
THE MUPPET IS NOW SEATED ON ME. THIS SITTING CANNOT STAND.
Nice one.
A GENEROUS-DOLLOP-BEYOND-MILD SHOCK GOING THROUGH SCAFFOLDING NOISE.
“Glaben!”
HIPPIE WHO LOOKS LIKE GARCIA SLUMPING TO THE STAGE NOISE
…
Dude.
HE WILL LIVE.
Worse than that is-
Lesh looks like he should be in the beach Boys
So true. But Bobby looks like Bobby, and Mrs. Donna Jean looks fine!